Being British - I don't always mean what I say

This really made me smile, it's just so true! We British, with our stiff upper lips and love of queueing, like to think of ourselves as being tactful and diplomatic. Yet, in our quest to avoid offence, it seems that we've developed a whole dictionary of phrases that really shouldn't be taken at face value.

I don't know about you, but I've used each and every one of these phrases. More than likely in a work situation where for some reason (probably to avoid being presented with a P45) we feel the need to be overly polite... through gritted teeth and after complaining privately to your most trusted colleagues!

So should we just say what we think, or are there some situations where we need to dance this merry dance? What do you think?

Thanks should be given to Funky Giraffe for posting this on their facebook feed.

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Making Mummy friends - my top tips

Help! I'm a first-time Mum and I don't know anyone else!

For many people (me definitely included) one of my biggest worries, aside from how on earth was I going to look after a baby having had no experience or training, was whether I was going to spend my maternity leave as a billy-no-mates, or whether I could find some new friends. Actually, I'll admit, this wasn't something that I spent ages worrying about. I had some blind hope and optimism that things would work themselves out. But I reckon that for a lot of people, this fear is up there among with the usual ones about coping with the lack of sleep and stink of endless dirty nappies.

I wanted to share my experiences about making mummy friends in the hope that someone else will benefit from my thoughts, tips and suggestions.

I thought I'd start with a few things that it's worth remembering...

1. Unless you and your best friend happened to get pregnant at the same time, most other mums are in the same boat and are also looking for a new social network.
2. For me, this is the biggest and most important thing - people are all different. You will not get on with everyone you meet.
3. You will have to put in some effort if you want to get the rewards.
4. Don't put all your eggs in one basket and don't give up at the first try.

These last three points are quite tough aren't they? And if you've never had to make new friends before, or you're shy, the whole thing can seem like a bit of a mountain to climb. Just keep the first point in mind - you are not alone.

So where to start? Here are a few places that I've found can be good for meeting potential new friends. I've listed what I think are the pros and cons of each place too.

NCT antenatal courses

I know a lot of people that have made new friends this way. In fact, I'd guess that for about 80% of people, they do an NCT antenatal course in the hope that it provides an instant social network.

Best bits

•  It's a chance for both you and your partner to meet other couples in the same boat - most other social events after the baby arrives don't involve dad
•  A very good friend of mine lives within walking distance of her entire group.
• It's great to have a support network in place before the baby arrives - people sharing the waiting game with you and suffering from the same end-of-pregnancy aches and pains. 
• The nature of the course - learning and discussing - provides ample opportunities for getting to know one another.
• You'll be put together with up to 7 other couples - chances are, you'll find you have something in common with at least one couple, hopefully more!

Worst bits

• The courses are not free (I paid over £160) and they get booked up quickly.
• Your group is thrown together by chance - I don't live within walking distance of anyone from my course. Only 2 couples live in the same town. The other 6 are 25-45 minutes drive away, which just hasn't been practical for meeting up regularly.

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Bumps and Babies group

My local children's centre runs this group on a weekly basis, I believe that such groups are fairly common across the UK.

Best bits

• If you have time, try to attend the group before your baby arrives, it will take away the stress of going once you have your baby in tow - and you'll get to meet other pregnant ladies due at a similar time. Simple things like knowing where it is and what happens are one less thing to worry about in those first few weeks when just leaving the house is hard.
• It's a great place to try breastfeeding in public for the first time.
• It doesn't matter if your baby cries or has an exploding nappy, the entire room is on your side!
• They're usually a drop-in, so you can arrive and leave when you like - so no stress about being late.

Worst bits

• Most people (in my experience) at the group will have already had their babies. You might feel a bit like the odd one out if you're still pregnant. They're busy discussing sleep, nappies and feeding which are totally alien topics until you've had your baby.
• They're not usually structured sessions, so you do need to join in and chat to the other mums and mums-to-be.
• I've heard people complain that they can be cliquey. Personally I don't buy in to this. What I think can happen is that people that go regularly make friends and chat to their friends there. For new people, it can seem hard to break into existing friendships. Just remember though, these friendships are likely to still be very new, so it's never too late to join in!

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Aquanatal and other prenatal classes

See whether your local leisure centre runs these classes, usually involving swimming or yoga.

Best bits

• Another place to meet other pregnant ladies before your baby arrives.
• Gentle exercise is great for preparing your body for labour.
• Swimming in particular is great for the end of pregnancy, making you feel weightless and easing some of your aches and pains.

Worse bits

• Class sizes can be quite large and intimidating.
• The nature of these classes means that they don't usually involve any kind of ice breaker. So you might end up with that old British way of everyone just sitting in silence with no one willing to speak first!
• You might not have time to attend these classes before your baby arrives.
• The drop-in nature can also mean that you don't see the same faces each week, especially as due dates approach.

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Baby massage, baby yoga, first-time-Mums & other groups

My local children's centre run these courses. In my area, they were free as well - bonus!

Best bits

• Places are usually limited to less than 10 mums and babies, which I think is a manageable amount of people. Big enough to include lots of different personalities, but not so big that it can be overwhelming.
• The skills and knowledge that you'll pick up will be invaluable.
• Meeting on a weekly basis can be a great way to slowly build up friendships.

Worse bits

• The first-time-mums type of groups are usually suitable with a newborn. Others such as massage and yoga are probably better when your little one is 3 months+, so not something you can go to immediately if you're ready to get out of the house straight away.
• Fitting courses in around naptimes can be tricky. And if you're paying, you want to be sure that you can attend the whole course which isn't always possible if you've had a bad night or your baby is poorly.

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Singing, signing and rhymetime groups 

Your local library probably runs a singing group, but singing classes and other singing groups might well operate where you live either on a fee basis or through your local children's centre.

Best bits

• The groups are great from the very beginning. The only problems you might face with taking a newborn is the relentless feeding in the early weeks!
• Singing is a great soothing tool for babies of all ages - it lulls newborns and distracts older babies.
• Unless you've been working with young children recently, your repertoire of nursery rhymes and songs is probably quite limited at first - these are great places to refresh your memory!

 Worse bits

• The format of the group doesn't usually allow for much mingling (in my experience anyway), especially if it's run in a library or another public space. But it can be a good place to bump into familiar faces from other groups, which can be a good ice breaker.
• My local rhymetime only runs in school term time and is on every other week, leaving long empty stretches during the Easter, summer and Christmas holidays.

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Buggy bootcamp and other postnatal fitness groups

Postnatal fitness groups can be found across the whole of the UK. Don't be put off by the word 'bootcamp' - they are not usually taught by Army instructors wearing camouflage! If you had a normal delivery, you are usually given the greenlight to start exercising again after your 6 week check with your GP. The cost per class probably varies, but mine cost £5 a session.

Best bits

• Being able to start exercising again and not having to worry about what to do with your baby is perfect.
• The classes are tailored to postnatal women and the exercises can be adapted according to how recently you gave birth, limiting the chance of damaging your still fragile body.
• The endorphins released during exercise will give you a boost which can help compensate for being sleep deprived, or if you're just feeling a bit rubbish about any extra weight that you're still carrying.

Worst bits

• I first went to one of these classes when Bobble was 8 weeks old. Although it is perfectly possible to exercise and breastfeed, I must admit that I didn't find it particularly comfortable. It was also tricky fitting the class in around feeds, especially during growth spurts.
• If your baby needs feeding or settling, you will need to stop exercising and sort them out. On an off day, this could lead you to missing a lot of the class, which can be frustrating especially when you've paid.

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Baby clinics and breastfeeding support groups

Most doctors surgeries run baby clinics at least twice a month giving you a place to drop in and get your baby weighed and chat through any concerns or questions you might have with the nurses and health visitors running the groups. Breastfeeding support groups might also be run by your surgery or another organisation such as La Leche League.

Best bits

• Your health visitor will advise you to get your baby weighed fairly regularly during their first year, so you will find yourself attending these clinics at least once a month.
• Breastfeeding support groups are a fantastic place to go if you're suffering from any kind of difficulty with breastfeeding, or if you simply want to check that you're doing it right.
• If you're nervous about feeding in public, either of these places is the ideal places to start.

Worst bits

• Personally, I didn't find that the clinics I attended provided much of an opportunity to sit and chat to other mums, but things might be different where you live.
• With no fixed agenda and being of a drop-in nature, it might be difficult to get chatting.

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Facebook groups

I didn't come across these until after Bobble was born, but where I live there are a couple of 'secret' Facebook groups for Mums and Mums-to-be.

Best bits

• The groups are for asking for advice on everything from feeding to weaning, potty training and beyond - a complete fountain of knowledge to be tapped into at any hour of the day.
• Once you get to grips with motherhood, you'll be able to share your own knowledge and advice with other mums.
• Not all the discussions are baby related, you never know what you might learn about your local area!

Worst bits

• The groups can be enormous, and because all the conversations are taking place online, discussions can become heated and personalities can clash. People do not always observe the same rules and manners online as they would do face to face.
• Groups are not necessarily formed around making new friends, so there might not be much chance to make the jump from online to face to face.
• You have to be invited to join 'secret' groups, so you'll need at least 1 friend who is in the know to begin with.

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Other places to make new friends

The places that I've listed above is by no means an exhaustive list of all the places that you might be able to make new friends - it's just a list of the places that I've experienced. I'm sure that websites such as Mumsnet and Netmums can also provide opportunities for meeting people in your area, not to mention one of the many Internet forums for pregnancy and beyond.

Final word - will you be my friend?

So how do you go from chatting at a group to taking things to the next stage, eeeek! I think it's a lot like dating. It's been a long time since I dated (in fact, my dating experience pre-dates mobile phones...) but I think the same rules apply. Don't be shy, chances are, the other Mummy (or Mummy-to-be) wants the same thing! Just try asking one of these things:

1. Find out what other groups they go to, and arrange to meet up at one.
2. See if they fancy meeting up for a walk or a coffee.
3. Swap numbers and arrange to meet up at the park or for a play date.

Good luck! I hope you make lots of lovely new friends. If I've left anything out, or you have any more tips to share, feel free to leave a comment.

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Through the lens - St Ives

St Ives, Cornwall, is one of my most favourite places. I love it. I've only been twice but we have plans to go again this year and I can't wait to take Bobble there.

This picture was taken in the late afternoon and is of Porthmeor beach. I'm a bit of a wannabe surfer - I have the board but no skill whatsoever - body boarding is more within my abilities. Although it doesn't look like it, this was actually shot in colour, it's just that the sun has bleached everything.

Porthmeor Beach, St Ives, Cornwall, UK

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Best ever chocolate cake

May is a busy month for us. We both celebrate our birthdays and sandwiched between them is our wedding anniversary. As well as lots of presents, this also means lots of cake!

My husband's birthday comes at the start of the month and, as always, he requested a chocolate cake. Always on the lookout for a new recipe, I thought I'd try something from my tried and trusted Hummingbird Bakery cookbook. It's always a little risky to try a new recipe for an important occasion, but I felt confident with the disaster of Bobble's birthday cake put behind me. So I settled upon the 'Brooklyn Blackout Cake'.

I'm pleased to report that I can confirm this that is a flipping brilliant recipe for chocolate cake. The cake is seriously chocolaty, light and moist.

The recipe 

(taken from the Hummingbird Bakery Cookbook)

• 100g unsalted butter, at room temperature
• 260g caster sugar
• 2 eggs
• 1/4 teaspoon vanilla extract
• 45g cocoa powder
• 3/4 teaspoon baking powder
• 3/4 teaspoon bicarbonate of soda
• a pinch of salt
• 170g plain flour
• 160 ml whole milk

1. Preheat the oven to 170c (325 Degrees F) or Gas Mark 3.
2. Put the butter and sugar in a free-standing electric mixer with a paddle attachment, or use a handheld electric whisk and cream until light and fluffy. 
3. Add the eggs one at a time, mixing well and scraping any unmixed ingredients from the side of the bowl with a rubber spatula after each addition. 
4. Turn the mixer down to slow speed and beat in the vanilla extract, cocoa powder, baking powder, bicarbonate of soda and salt until well mixed. 
5. Add half the flour, then all the milk, and finish with the remaining flour. 
6. Mix well until everything is well combined. 
7. Pour the mixture into the two prepared cake tins and smooth over with a palette knife. Bake in the preheated oven for 25-30mins. Leave the cakes to cool slightly in the tins before turning out onto a wire cooling rack to cool completely.

There is a second part to the recipe which involves creating a chocolate custard and crumb coating to finish the cake, but I didn't bother with this as I had other plans for the decoration!

Instead, I made a chocolate buttercream to completely cover and sandwich the cake together. I then stuck chocolate fingers to the outside of the cake (I used almost 3 boxes!) before finishing it off with a few malteasers and the all important birthday candles.

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Frugal baby shopping - NCT Nearly New Sales

You've probably guessed by now that when it comes to spending money, I like to get good value! Shopping for Bobble's arrival, was one of my biggest challenges to date. It's so easy to spend £100s, if not £1000s on baby equipment without even trying. In my book, money spent unnecessarily on baby stuff is money that could be put towards holidays!

There are plenty of ways that you can save money when it comes to baby shopping, but in this post I'm going to focus on one of my favourites - NCT Nearly New Sales. If you're not familiar with them, the National Childbirth Trust is a great charity. They're the UK's largest charity for parents. Many people choose to take one of their antenatal courses, but aside from this, they also campaign as the voice for parents on the issues they care about. Find out more on the NCT website.

This is how the NCT describe their nearly new sales:

"The cost of kitting out your child for the first five years can run into thousands of pounds. NCT Nearly New Sales are the perfect solution, offering affordable essentials and accessories for you and your family, while fundraising to support other parents in the UK. You'll also be helping the environment by recycling your family's old belongings or buying pre-loved items."

Before I give my tips on how to get the best out of these sales, here are some quick Q&As about NCT nearly new sales...

Q. When do they take place?
A. Usually twice a year, once in the Spring (March-May) and once in the Autumn (September-November).

Q. Where do they take place?
A. NCT have branches all over the country. Visit the NCT website to find out when the next sale is on near to you.

Q. Do I have to be a member to gain entry to the sale?
A. No, but it  does help - I'll explain why in my tips.

Q. Do I have to pay an entry fee?
A. This varies from branch to branch. Usually there's an entry fee of around £1, but sometimes members get in for free.

Q. What sort of things can I buy at a sale?
A. So many things! Clothes, toys, shoes, furniture, highchairs, weaning equipment, maternity clothes, books, slings and carriers, pushchairs... The only things that you won't be able to buy are car seats, mattresses and electrical items (not including battery powered toys).

Need to know - my top tips for getting the most out of an NCT nearly new sale

Planning your visit

1. Become an NCT member. Members get early entry (usually around 10-15 minutes before everyone else) to the sale. Once the masses come in, it's a complete free for all. The good stuff goes really quickly. You will more than get your membership money back if you're buying bigger ticket items like cots and pushchairs.
2. Know exactly what you're looking for, so that you can prioritise your time. If you're looking for a highchair for example, there will only be a small number and the best ones will usually get snapped up within the first 10 minutes, so look at these first.
3. Make fast decisions. If you want it, buy it then and there. If you change your mind later on, you can always re-sell it.
4. You can usually pay by card or cash.
5. Depending on where you live in the country, you might live near several sales. It's worth going to a few different sales as the stock can vary enormously. I once went to two in the same day!
6. Go with your partner or a friend - then you can split up and grab bargains from different sections!
7. If you're taking your baby, put them in a sling to keep both your hands free.

 Buying clothes

1. With clothes shopping, my approach is to grab everything I like the look of, then sift through it in a quiet corner and put back anything that isn't right. 
2. Check clothes over carefully. Some seller's opinions of what counts as 'nearly new' condition might be vastly different from your own.
3. The best bargains will usually be for children aged 12 months and under. I've found it to be fairly slim pickings for 12 months+ - probably because parents are wiser about how much they need and because they are worn for longer, wear and tear is higher. You might still be able to pick up some ok clothes for your child to wear to nursery.
4. A small number of clothes will still have tags attached - these are the best bargains.
5. As well as maternity clothes, I picked up a few nursing tops after Bobble was born.

Buying toys and books

1. Books can be a great purchase. Provided that they're not actually ripped, a well used book can still give great amounts of pleasure.
2. Check toys over carefully. I've bought a few toys at sales, but wouldn't describe any as nearly new - most are well used. Decide what can be cleaned up, and what is tatty and past its best.
3. Wooden jigsaw puzzles can be a good purchase as they last well - check all the pieces are there.
4. In addition to storybooks, you can also pick up childcare and weaning recipe books.
5. Toys are usually sorted by age (pre-school and older) - think ahead and look for toys that your little one might be into in 6 months time.

Buying big ticket items like cots, highchairs and pushchairs

1. If you're looking for a pushchair that sells for more than £500 new, you're better off looking at ebay, I haven't ever seen any of the Bugaboo/iCandy/Stokke branded pushchairs at a nearly new sale.
2. There will be NCT volunteers on hand to show you how the item works - if you need help, ask as they will almost certainly be a mum (or even a dad) too.

How much will things cost?

I'm basing this entirely on my own experience, so there's definitely a disclaimer here that prices will vary from sale to sale! In the past, I have bought the following items from nearly new sales.

Wooden cot: £25
Moses basket: £15
Bumbo seat: £7:50
Sling (brand new baby bjorn): £15
Clothes: From 50p - £4 (t shirts, shorts, dungarees, coat, trousers, jumpers, swimwear)
Toys: £1 and upwards
Books: £1 and upwards

A few of my past sale purchases!

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Top tip - easy access mini herb garden

This tip is so simple, I know I won't be the first to have thought of it, but I'll share it all the same.

I like to use fresh herbs in our cooking when a recipe calls for it. Dried herbs have their place, but you definitely get a much bigger flavour boost when you use fresh. When we moved out of flats and into our first house I was very keen to have a herb garden. In the past I've tried to grow herbs in pots on the windowsill but never had much luck keeping them alive. For me, the problem with growing them outdoors is ensuring they're accessible in all weathers - dashing across a soggy garden in the rain to retrieve a few sprigs of thyme doesn't appeal to the lazy side of me! So I struck upon a smart idea. Make the herbs accessible from the kitchen window.

All we had to do was attach a trough to the wall just below our kitchen window. I then stocked it full of the herbs that we use most frequently that are hardy enough to live outside. In my mini herb garden you will find rosemary, thyme and parsley. Now I simply lean out of the kitchen window and grab whatever I need, whenever I need it. No need to take your slippers off or put a coat on!

I restock the basket once a year in the spring as not everything will survive winter, especially one as long and as cold as the one we've just had. Keep it well watered in the summer and you will be able to enjoy easy access fresh herbs the whole year round.

To make your own mini herb garden you'll need:

•  A fixed-to-the-wall hanging basket or trough - B&Q sell a 24 inch basket with liner for under a tenner
• Soil
• Potted herbs - expect to pay between £4-6 from your local garden centre or DIY shop
• A watering can to keep your herbs refreshed
• Different herbs like sun/shade, but there's nothing wrong with experimenting to see what thrives.

Happy herby growing!

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Baking an important cake - lessons to be learnt!

I love baking, but I wouldn't say that I'm particularly talented at it. I guess I would describe myself as a fairly confident, but safe baker. I can do a mean chocolate brownie and I like making cupcakes, but I'm certainly not the kind of person who would get approached to make an important cake. But when it came to Bobble's first birthday, I knew that his birthday cake had to be homemade.

I've made plenty of birthday cakes in the past, usually for my husband or another member of my family. But I've always stuck to a simple chocolate cake, which I know that I can make and I know that will be wolfed down appreciatively. For Bobble's first birthday, I set my sights a little higher. I wanted the cake to look the part. After all, Bobble will have no memories of his first birthday, there will only be photos and videos. Decoration was to be key, so I set about some research. After browsing through several pages of Google Images I decided that a lion cake would be achievable and within my limited experience of cake decorating! Further research led me to discover that I couldn't just bake a basic Victoria sponge - it would collapse under the weight of the icing. I needed to make either a Madeira cake, or some other more solid 'celebration' type cake that could support the icing.

On Baking Day (the day before Bobble's birthday and 2 days before the party) I ran up an impressive catalogue of disasters which included...

• Cake #1 (Maderia cake) - recipe didn't provide oven temperature guidance for a fan assisted oven and I forgot to make allowances. End result = 1 overcooked and barely risen cake. Number of eggs used so far: 4.
• Cake #2 (Easy vanilla sponge - receipe to follow) - I got distracted and rather than putting in two separate quantities of plain and self raising flour, I only put in plain flour. End result = Pancake. Number of eggs used so far: 9
• At this point I ran out of the key ingredients eggs and butter.
• Cake #3 (Easy vanilla sponge second attempt) - there were tense moments as I wasn't sure how long to cook the cake for due to using 2 round tins rather than 1 square tin. End result = Finally! A cake that I can use. Number of eggs used in total: 13.

My day of disasters wasn't over yet...before I went to bed I also encountered the following:

• Assumed garage burglery that turned out to be a case of me failling to lock the garage door. Twice.
• Assumed oven breakdown that turned out to be a case of me accidentally turning the oven on to timer.
• Hands that made me look like a Simpsons character due to their yellow hue (food colouring to blame).

After all that, I'm not sure that the cake could ever have been as perfect as I hoped, but it looked the (homemade) part. And I hope that when Bobble is a bit older, he'll look at it and know that it was baked with love, and a whole lot of eggs!

The recipe

This receipe calls itself an Easy Vanilla Sponge. I'd question the use of the word easy, but it did taste good.

View the recipe on the BBC's Good Food website 

So, if you've got an important cake to make, I reckon you can learn a thing or two from me!

1. If you're making a cake that you've never made before, and you've got the time, do a trial run.
2. Leave yourself plenty of time! Baking and icing on the same day whilst looking after an 11 month old isn't ideal.
3. Have spare ingredients to hand... just in case.
4. Concentrate! So many of my mistakes were down to rushing and not paying attention. Just pretend you're back at school.
5. Remember that homemade is not just made at home, it's made with love. And it doesn't have to look perfect.

Happy baking.

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Top tip - gift shopping for a newborn

When my first niece was born almost 6 years ago, she was the first baby that 'legitimally' granted me access to baby shops. Before then, even venturing into the baby section of a department store would set my other half's pulse racing and make cold beads of sweat appear on his forehead.

Have you ever noticed how baby shops are a bit like carpet and tile shops? Until you become a homeowner, these shops are invisible. Mothercare, Mamas and Papas and all the rest - you just don't see them until you need to. Once that veil is lifted and you enter The Baby Section, it's a world of confusion. But for a lot of ladies (and I'm definitely including myself in this) the sight of all those adorable teeny tiny clothes can set your biological clock into overdrive!

What I didn't realise until I became a mother, was what sort of gift would be useful to new parents. Without bordering on the side of ungrateful, I thought I'd share some tips on the kind of presents that I would now buy for a newborn, and what I might avoid.

What to avoid

First of all, I'll start with the things I would be very careful when buying. I would like to emphasise that of course, no presents are ungratefully received, I'm just passing on my advice of what the new parents might really love to receive. I am definitely guilty of making these mistakes, so don't feel bad, it's definitely the thought that counts!

• If you're buying clothes, definitely buy at least a size or two up (3-6 months or 6-9 months) but beware of the seasons! Work out what time of year the baby will be at that size so that you can avoid buying a thick jumper for the summer, or a pair of shorts for winter. It is tricky because the clothes available in the shops are usually for the current and next season, so it's really easy to make this mistake.
• Booties, scratch mits and hats while incredibly cute, are not actually that useful (in my humble opinion). Booties fall off. Scratch mits fall off and a lot of sleepsuits now come with built in mittens. Babies only need to wear hats outside and the parents will probably have plenty already.
• Cuddly and soft toys... maybe a slightly sensitive one, but bear in mind that the baby won't play with these for almost a year... unless you count chewing and dribbling. UPDATE: Actually, I'm going to backtrack on this one as we did receive some lovely soft toys that Bobble does now play with. I guess I'm just wary as I know some parents that received loads of soft toys - I'll let you decide!
• White and neutral clothes. If the parents didn't know whether they were have a blue or pink flavoured bundle, they will probably have already got quite a lot of white and neutral sleepsuits and baby-gros. Why not buy something bright and colourful instead?
• It's not mandatory to dress babies in either baby blue and soft pink!
• Any kind of shoes. Like booties and hats, you can get some incredibly cute shoes, but for me, I didn't want the hassle of another thing to wrestle with during nappy changes.

So what should you buy... these are my ideas of what would go down well.

Clothes

• A lot of people don't bother to dress their baby in anything other than sleepsuits or baby-gros for the first few months of their life, so if you're going to buy an outfit, buy it in a 3-6+ month size.
• Babies wear sleepsuits at bedtime for at least the first year of their life, so these are a very safe bet.
• Vests are worn underneath clothes for at least the first year too, and while they're not the most exciting present to buy, you can get some pretty funky ones out there.
• Dribble bibs! See my other post about beating the dribble.

Toys

• Any kind of teething toy will be appreciated. Everything goes in the mouth for almost the whole of the first year, so something specificially designed to be chomped on is great.
• Lamaze make some wonderful, brightly coloured toys and many are suitable from birth. 
• Musical instruments - basic rattles or bell toys will give pleasure right the way through to 12+. 
• Anything with a mirror on will go down well. 

Books

• You can't go wrong with books. While it will be a long time until the baby is reading, something simple that the parent can read to the baby during storytime will be appreciated.
• Books with flaps, pop up bits and finger puppets are fab and will delight the baby.

Vouchers

• Not the cop out you might think! New parents receive so many presents - I found the generosity overwhelming - so a voucher that they can put aside and spend a few months later on something they later discover that they need for their baby is a great option. Some of the places that I'd love to receive a gift voucher for would include Marks and Spencer, Sainsbury (incredibly lovely and good value clothes in the Tu range), Mothercare/ELC, Mamas and Papas, John Lewis and Debenhams.

Other ideas

Why not get creative and think outside the box with one of these ideas?

• Pampering session for Mum.
• An offer of an evening or day of babysitting.
• A voucher for a trip to a pottery painting cafe - see my other post about making memories.
• If you've got great photographic skills, why not offer to come and take some photos of the baby and mum and dad?
• Chocolates - the appetite of the breastfeeding mum is enormous!
• A platter of soft cheeses and pate if mum was a big fan of these banned foods!

How have your present buying habits changed since you became a parent? Or what has been the best present that you received for your newborn? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Photo credit: TangoPango / Foter.com / CC BY-NC   

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Penny pinching - shopping online

I like saving money. I love the thrill of the chase of getting a bargain. TK Maxx - a real marmite shop isn't it? Well I love it. Rooting through the rails in search of the ultimate bargain, preferably at a 70% discount, or more!

Online shopping is all about sniffing out the best offer, so quite naturally, I love this too. So imagine my delight when I discovered one of the easiest ways of saving money online - cashback. Like anything that appears to be simple AND pays cash direct into your bank account, I was very sceptical at first. However, I can hand-on-heart say that there is nothing dubious about cashback websites, or at least not the one I use anyway.

How do cashback websites work?

In the world of online, retailers have recognised the fact that when a customer makes a purchase, there are many factors that can come between adding an item to their basket, and actually paying for the item and making the purchase. These distractions are far stronger than those found in an actual shop. Imagine having an item in your hand - from here (queues aside) it's a fairly short journey to handing over your money and leaving with your new swag. Online you've got everything from your favourite programme starting on TV to phone calls and last minute checks of other websites to make sure you've got the best deal. So how about a little bit of temptation for the customer, in the form of saving you some extra pennies? Retailers are more than happy to take this little hit if it results in a purchase. In short, they pay a commission to cashback websites in return for the cashback website referring a sale to them. Everyone's a winner.

What do I need to do?

Very little. You can still make all of your purchases on the website that you intended to buy from. All you need to do is visit the cashback website first, so that it can track your purchase. Oh, and obviously you need to sign up to a cashback website first and create an account. Once the purchase has been confirmed, the payment is made to the cashback website, who in turn pass the money on to you.

Is there a catch?

There really isn't. Some of the cashback sites charge an annual fee, others don't. You have to be 16 to open an account and resident in the UK.

How much money can I make?

It's best to regard cashback websites as a bonus. It's certainly not a get-rich-quick scheme, nor should you resign from your job to become a professional online shopper! To give you a quick snapshot, in the last year I have tracked almost £1000 of online purchases through Quidco (that's the amount of money that I have spent online) and from this I have been paid almost £70 cashback. That's £70 I have received simply for shopping online, as I would have done regardless of belonging to a cashback website or not.

Find out more

The wonderful moneysavingexpert.com website has a complete guide to cashback websites.

Read the moneysavingexpert guide to cashback websites

I hope this posts helps you to pinch some pennies!

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Top tip - Beating the dribble

Today's post is a slobbery and wet one. No, I'm not talking about kissing, I'm talking about dribbling. Specifically baby dribble. Anyone who has observed young babies usually comes to the conclusion that for most of the time, they are either leaking from their nose or their mouth. Lovely. Bobble was no different and so far seems have suffered from back-to-back colds in winter and regular dribbling since he was about 3 months old. Colds I can't help with, but dribble I can. Well I can't stop it (apparently it's because swallowing excess saliva caused by teething isn't a skill they're born with) but I can make them look a little cuter.

The answer is dribble bibs, bandanna style ones. What's so special about these? Well firstly they're a little more stylish than regular bibs. And secondly, they're designed to cope with dribble rather than food or drink spills - they sit much higher up to catch the dribble direct from the source! The best ones are fleece-backed, which stops the dribble soaking right through to their clothes.

Before Bobble came along, I hadn't really seen bandanna bibs around that much, but now they seem to be everywhere from Tesco to Next, and all the other shops selling baby clothes. When it came to buying some bibs for Bobble, I asked around for the best place to buy them and one place came up time and time again - Funky Giraffe.

Here's why I love Funky Giraffe dribble bibs:

• there are loads and loads of different designs to choose from - with new ones being added all the time
• they have poppers on them, which are much harder for babies to remove than a Velcro fastening (Velcro is a nightmare in the washing machine as it sticks to everything)
• they are fleece backed
• the more you buy, the cheaper they are - giving you an excuse to buy one for every outfit!
• Bobble looks incredibly cute wearing them.

I'll be doing a longer post about this topic later on, but I'd definitely include some dribble bibs in a present for a newborn. The parents will find them much more useful than a soft toy or a pair of booties!

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